I’m Fine.
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Dear Baby Jesus, Please Don’t Let Me Ruin This
When you leave a tumultuous relationship and start one that is actually, what’s the word? Healthy? It can leave your brain going, uh BRO, what’s happening here?! My on-and-off-on-and-off until the end of time relationship was with a very insecure man. He spewed hateful words at me when he lost his temper, then denied ever
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My Touchstone Couple
When my marriage hit the crapper, I wasn’t shocked. I created it. I did it, and I watched it come to an end. But I was taken aback by just how quickly it unraveled. One loose thread, overlooked, and it was over. Signing my divorce decree was sad and humbling but not devastating. We had
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The Kid I Never Knew I Wanted
I never wanted children. Growing up, I never fantasized about future kids because I wouldn’t have them. Kids, to me, were messy and sticky, not funny, and so annoying. Growing up, I had a wonderful and loving mother who put her children first in everything she did. And my brain thought, HARD PASS on that!
More Words n’ Stuff
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Lonely and Pointing
I had my first child, Scarlett, just before I turned 28. She came into this world as nothing short of absolutely perfect. I couldn’t look in her eyes without tearing up those first few days after she was born. Once I saw her, I knew I had to do everything for her. Everything. There is Read more
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Why Every Girl Needs A Trio
In the second to last episode of the final season of Sex and the City, Big sits down with Carrie’s three best girlfriends. As the women stare him down, he explains that he knows he hasn’t always treated Carrie well. They listen (with raised eyebrows). And then he says, “You three know her better than Read more
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Horny Ms. Pac-Man Strikes Again
I am waiting for my date at a bar in Minneapolis. It’s happy hour, and I am early, per usual. I hate walking into the first date late and watching the guy I am meeting size me up. I always want to ask them, better or worse than expected? Instead, I look at the menu, Read more
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Oh No. I am the Problem
About a year ago, I was visiting my longtime friends in Arizona and staying with one of my favorite couples, Becky and Tare. I have known Becky longer than I have not known her. She is one of my people; she is a part of me. Through the years, I had watched Becky make horrible Read more
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Why I Could Never Date Jesus
Ok, I am not so naive that I think Jesus would want to date me. I realize he would look at my rap sheet and instantly go, “Oh Me H. Me! HARD PASS!” Or would he? Might my sketchy past (read: present) entice him? Make him think he can “turn this one around”? Whether Jesus Read more
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When Your Mom Enters the Dating Scene and Has Horrible Taste in Men
Author’s note: I originally wrote this piece on Medium in 2021. Since then, I have met my Mom’s new man-friend. He treats her like the God damn queen that she is. After 50 years of dating and marrying men who didn’t even deserve to look at her, she is finally happy with this man. It’s Read more
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Walking Dumpster Fire 